In what friends are calling “a musical hostage situation,” 29-year-old Greg Thompson has been jamming non-stop since Friday night after smoking a new strain called Endless Groove. What started as a casual strum on his old guitar has now become an endless solo that’s driven his roommates to the brink.

“It’s actually kind of horrifying,” said Greg’s roommate, Alex Jensen. “It’s just this endless, meandering solo that makes no sense. I’ve heard Free Bird at least seven times, each time somehow worse than the last. The song never stops. Ever. It just keeps going, and every time I think it’s done, he finds a way to keep riffing.”

Friends Are Concerned, But Greg Just Can’t Hear Them Over the Music

At first, friends thought it was funny. “We were like, ‘Haha, look at Greg getting into it,’” said neighbor and friend Lauren Martin. “But now, he’s somehow turned Hotel California into an infinite loop. It’s fucking annoying. I didn’t even know it was possible to stretch that song past 6 minutes, but he’s been playing it for hours. And every time I think he’s wrapping it up, he just hits that same damn E minor chord and dives right back in.”

Roommates say they’ve tried suggesting he “maybe take a break” or “switch to something quieter,” but Greg is reportedly too “in the groove” to hear them. “He just keeps saying, ‘The music flows through me, man,’” Alex added, visibly tired. “The jam has taken over his life—and ours. At this point, he’s less of a roommate and more of a live-in guitar solo.”

“This Strain Is No Joke”

According to cannabis researchers, Endless Groove is a potent sativa blend known for enhancing focus and creativity. “It’s not uncommon for this strain to create a flow state,” said Dr. Fiona Greene, a cannabis researcher, “but in Greg’s case, it seems to have opened some kind of mental loop. He’s trapped in what we’re calling the ‘Jam Continuum,’ where he’s just endlessly noodling around on the guitar.”

Alex and Lauren, however, aren’t interested in scientific explanations—they just want the soloing to stop. “If this keeps up,” Alex sighed, “I might have to hide the guitar. Or burn it.”